Freaking pissed!!! or is it hurt?

I am depressed! Feeling sick and miserable... although I try not to think about me being sick I just can't help it! Hate taking those horrible medicine, it just taste bad and I keep needing to go to the toliet which is so darn annoying.. can't get any proper sleep.. Loosing my patience! REALLY IN A SOUR MOOD! Pls stay away and dun make me pissed coz I can't take it, not now just dun give me any nonsense for the time being.. pls pls pls....

Talking of crap, just got a whole lot of it from someone today! Pissed the hell out of me.. venting my anger now coz it's been bottled up for so long and I just need to let the steam go.. K now count from 1 to 10... Cool down.. Humzz dun seem to be working... well just gonna try and sleep it off... Dun understand why must he be like that, sometimes it just gets me wondering wat the hell is going on and what is so wrong with me? Am I that bad or am I too good? I just dun understand it anymore.. I can't be too nice and I can't be bad.. so WAT am I suppose to be? In-between doesn't seem to work too...!!!!! How come.... why is it like this??? Feel like crying and screaming at the sametime.. People are so hard to figure actually not people but just this particular person.. I can't keep up with the change in attitude, sometimes I feel like a princess, sometimes I feel like dog..or worst. It hurts more than it pisses me off.. hurt is the word to use.. hurt the thing I am feeling right this moment.. stabbing at me and tearing me apart.. I dun wanna hurt like this but I just can't help it..

I always wonder why is it that I can take nonsense like this.. I used to be someone who would yell at the moment someone even thinks about treating me this way.. not say yell but I will back out immediately.. but why is this different.. is it me who changed or is it something else.. I dun quite understand. So upset still..so sad :( so lost and hurt... need somewhere to lick my wounds. Maybe dreamland can give me an answer...